Grim Reaper Week: Favourite Quotes from The Charley Davidson Series by Darynda Jones!!

Hey there guys!

Let's continue the celebration of Grim Reaper Week and what better way to do so that to give you all a few teasers about the series in the shape of some of my favourite quotes? Emma is gonna be in charge of reviewing books for you guys, so don't forget to go check out her blog HERE and I just want to remind the fans of the series of how outrageously funny Charley is, and how otherwordly sexy Reyes can be! And if you guys haven't checked the series, maybe one of the quotes will make you want to give it a try!

Ready? here we go!

First Grave On The Right

“My fore-parts, as you so ineloquently put it, have names.”

I pointed to my right breast. “This is Danger.” Then my left. “And this is Will Robinson. I would appreciate it if you addressed them accordingly.”

After a long pause in which he took the time to blink several times, he asked, “You named your breasts?”

I turned my back to him with a shrug. “I named my ovaries, too, but they don’t get out as much.”
― Darynda Jones, First Grave on the Right

 

“I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, "This is Beam Me Up." Then to my right. "And this is Scotty." Garret chuckled and buried his face in his hands. He asked.”
― Darynda Jones, First Grave on the Right 


Second Grave On The Left

“Make it quick," I said when I picked up.
"Okay. Two men from the FBI are here." Cookie said. Quickly.
Crap. "Men in black are at the office?"
"Well, yes, but they're actually in more of a navy."
Crapola. I so don't have time for men. In any color. "Okay, two questions. Do they look mad, and are they hot?"
After a long, long, pause, Cookie said, "One, not really. Two, no comment at this time. And three, you're on speakerphone."
After another long, long pause, I said, "Okie dokie then. Be there in a jiff.”
― Darynda Jones, Second Grave on the Left

  “Cookie dropped her purse and tried to catch it midair. In the process, she knocked over a vase. When she lunged for the vase, she slipped on the tile and overturned an entire table. A lovely handblown piece of glass flew in my direction, and all I could think as I caught it was, Really? Again? We were going to have to practice muscle control.”
― Darynda Jones, Second Grave on the Left 


Third Grave Dead Ahead

“Hey, boss. Where are you?” she asked.
“I just picked up something to eat. What about professional belly dancers?”
“Um, I don’t know, maybe with horseradish.”
― Darynda Jones, Third Grave Dead Ahead

  “At first, I could lie about my lack of sleep and she'd fall for it, but she started suspecting insomnia when I began seeing purple elephants in the air vents at the office. I knew I shouldn't have asked her about them. I thought maybe she'd redecorated.”
― Darynda Jones, Third Grave Dead Ahead 


Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

 “I should’ve known the day was going to turn out bad when it started with my father trying to kill me”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

  “For one week, all I could think about was drinking margaritas--well, that and running my tongue along Reyes's teeth--but I didn't have salt--or Reyes's teeth. I'd also lacked the energy to leave my apartment to get some--or the desire to stoop low enough to beg Reyes to let me lick his teeth after what he did--so I could only wish for a margarita. And dream of Reyes's teeth.

I'd secretly hoped a margarita would magically appear in my hand, but that would mean I would have to put down the remote, and God knew that was not going to happen.”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet 


Fifth Grave Past The Light

 “I started to put my phone back in my bag when Ozzy yelled out, his accent so thick, I was only half certain he said, "Where the foock are ya goin'?"

Uncle Bob jumped. I must've turned on my GPS.

"You have to tahn the foock around. You're in the middle of foockin' nowhere."

"What the hell is that?" Uncle Bob asked, almost swerving off the road.

"Sorry, it's Ozzy." I grabbed my phone and turned down the volume. "He's so demanding." I pushed a few buttons to turn off the app, then put the phone to my ear. "Sweet, buttermilk pancakes, Ozzy, you have to stop calling me. You're a married man!" I pretended to hang up, then rolled my eyes. "Rock stars.”
― Darynda Jones, Fifth Grave Past the Light

  “How would you like your eggs?"

I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. "Fertilized?”
― Darynda Jones, Fifth Grave Past the Light 


Sixth Grave On The Edge


“Reyes. Alexander. Farrow," I said.

Seconds after I spoke his name, Reyes walked into his bedroom, and I looked across the open space directly from my room into his.

He waited for me to continue.

"I feel like there's something missing from my bedroom."

A dimple appeared at the corner of his mouth. "You don't say."

"Any idea what that might be?"

He glanced around my room as well, then shrugged. "I can't imagine."

"Oh, wait," I said, stepping from my room into his, "wasn't there something here? Like, I don't know, a wall or something?"

He looked up. "You could be right. I do seem to remember a barrier of some kind here."

"Yep," I said, stepping closer, "I definitely remember a partition separating our apartments." When his only response was a mischievous tilt of his full mouth, I asked, "Where did you put my wall?"

He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against his doorframe. "What makes you think I took it?"

"It was there this morning."

"And that means I took it? Maybe you just misplaced it. Where exactly did you see it last?"

I pressed my lips together. "You tore down my wall."

The smile he wore could've charmed the panties off a nun. Completely unrepentant, he admitted, "I tore down your wall.”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge

  “You can't trust anything on the Internet."
"Can, too," I said, completed offended.
"So, if I posted a comment saying I was an Arabian prince from Milwaukee?"
"Yeah, but you're a big fat liar. You don't count. I mean, look at your dad. Pathological liar numeral uno. Lying is in your genes."
He leaned forward. There's only one thing in my jeans right now.”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge


And because why not and the excerpt wasn't nearly enough, here go also a pair of quotes from Seventh Grave and No Body!

“I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.”


 “If I’m upset, hold me and tell me how beautiful I am.

If I growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate.

— BEST. ADVICE. EVER.”

 Well guys, I hope you enjoyed reading those quotes at least half as much as I did picking them!

And don't forget to enter the INTERNATIONAL giveaway we have running till next week!!

a Rafflecopter giveaway