Grim Reaper Week: Favourite Quotes from The Charley Davidson Series by Darynda Jones!!

Hey there guys!

Let's continue the celebration of Grim Reaper Week and what better way to do so that to give you all a few teasers about the series in the shape of some of my favourite quotes? Emma is gonna be in charge of reviewing books for you guys, so don't forget to go check out her blog HERE and I just want to remind the fans of the series of how outrageously funny Charley is, and how otherwordly sexy Reyes can be! And if you guys haven't checked the series, maybe one of the quotes will make you want to give it a try!

Ready? here we go!

First Grave On The Right

“My fore-parts, as you so ineloquently put it, have names.”

I pointed to my right breast. “This is Danger.” Then my left. “And this is Will Robinson. I would appreciate it if you addressed them accordingly.”

After a long pause in which he took the time to blink several times, he asked, “You named your breasts?”

I turned my back to him with a shrug. “I named my ovaries, too, but they don’t get out as much.”
― Darynda Jones, First Grave on the Right

 

“I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, "This is Beam Me Up." Then to my right. "And this is Scotty." Garret chuckled and buried his face in his hands. He asked.”
― Darynda Jones, First Grave on the Right 


Second Grave On The Left

“Make it quick," I said when I picked up.
"Okay. Two men from the FBI are here." Cookie said. Quickly.
Crap. "Men in black are at the office?"
"Well, yes, but they're actually in more of a navy."
Crapola. I so don't have time for men. In any color. "Okay, two questions. Do they look mad, and are they hot?"
After a long, long, pause, Cookie said, "One, not really. Two, no comment at this time. And three, you're on speakerphone."
After another long, long pause, I said, "Okie dokie then. Be there in a jiff.”
― Darynda Jones, Second Grave on the Left

  “Cookie dropped her purse and tried to catch it midair. In the process, she knocked over a vase. When she lunged for the vase, she slipped on the tile and overturned an entire table. A lovely handblown piece of glass flew in my direction, and all I could think as I caught it was, Really? Again? We were going to have to practice muscle control.”
― Darynda Jones, Second Grave on the Left 


Third Grave Dead Ahead

“Hey, boss. Where are you?” she asked.
“I just picked up something to eat. What about professional belly dancers?”
“Um, I don’t know, maybe with horseradish.”
― Darynda Jones, Third Grave Dead Ahead

  “At first, I could lie about my lack of sleep and she'd fall for it, but she started suspecting insomnia when I began seeing purple elephants in the air vents at the office. I knew I shouldn't have asked her about them. I thought maybe she'd redecorated.”
― Darynda Jones, Third Grave Dead Ahead 


Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

 “I should’ve known the day was going to turn out bad when it started with my father trying to kill me”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

  “For one week, all I could think about was drinking margaritas--well, that and running my tongue along Reyes's teeth--but I didn't have salt--or Reyes's teeth. I'd also lacked the energy to leave my apartment to get some--or the desire to stoop low enough to beg Reyes to let me lick his teeth after what he did--so I could only wish for a margarita. And dream of Reyes's teeth.

I'd secretly hoped a margarita would magically appear in my hand, but that would mean I would have to put down the remote, and God knew that was not going to happen.”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet 


Fifth Grave Past The Light

 “I started to put my phone back in my bag when Ozzy yelled out, his accent so thick, I was only half certain he said, "Where the foock are ya goin'?"

Uncle Bob jumped. I must've turned on my GPS.

"You have to tahn the foock around. You're in the middle of foockin' nowhere."

"What the hell is that?" Uncle Bob asked, almost swerving off the road.

"Sorry, it's Ozzy." I grabbed my phone and turned down the volume. "He's so demanding." I pushed a few buttons to turn off the app, then put the phone to my ear. "Sweet, buttermilk pancakes, Ozzy, you have to stop calling me. You're a married man!" I pretended to hang up, then rolled my eyes. "Rock stars.”
― Darynda Jones, Fifth Grave Past the Light

  “How would you like your eggs?"

I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. "Fertilized?”
― Darynda Jones, Fifth Grave Past the Light 


Sixth Grave On The Edge


“Reyes. Alexander. Farrow," I said.

Seconds after I spoke his name, Reyes walked into his bedroom, and I looked across the open space directly from my room into his.

He waited for me to continue.

"I feel like there's something missing from my bedroom."

A dimple appeared at the corner of his mouth. "You don't say."

"Any idea what that might be?"

He glanced around my room as well, then shrugged. "I can't imagine."

"Oh, wait," I said, stepping from my room into his, "wasn't there something here? Like, I don't know, a wall or something?"

He looked up. "You could be right. I do seem to remember a barrier of some kind here."

"Yep," I said, stepping closer, "I definitely remember a partition separating our apartments." When his only response was a mischievous tilt of his full mouth, I asked, "Where did you put my wall?"

He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against his doorframe. "What makes you think I took it?"

"It was there this morning."

"And that means I took it? Maybe you just misplaced it. Where exactly did you see it last?"

I pressed my lips together. "You tore down my wall."

The smile he wore could've charmed the panties off a nun. Completely unrepentant, he admitted, "I tore down your wall.”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge

  “You can't trust anything on the Internet."
"Can, too," I said, completed offended.
"So, if I posted a comment saying I was an Arabian prince from Milwaukee?"
"Yeah, but you're a big fat liar. You don't count. I mean, look at your dad. Pathological liar numeral uno. Lying is in your genes."
He leaned forward. There's only one thing in my jeans right now.”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge


And because why not and the excerpt wasn't nearly enough, here go also a pair of quotes from Seventh Grave and No Body!

“I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.”


 “If I’m upset, hold me and tell me how beautiful I am.

If I growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate.

— BEST. ADVICE. EVER.”

 Well guys, I hope you enjoyed reading those quotes at least half as much as I did picking them!

And don't forget to enter the INTERNATIONAL giveaway we have running till next week!!

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Grim Reaper Week: Seventh Grave And No Body by Darynda Jones - An Excerpt!!

Happy Halloween everyone!!

To continue with our celebration of the Charley Davidson series and Grim Reaper Week we're sharing two excerpts today, one right here and one on Emma's blog: Never Judge a Book by the Cover! So be sure to check out both our blogs and do not forget to enter the giveaway for a copy of Seventh Grave And No Body!

"When I stepped past the threshold of our room, our beds still butted up against each other, since he’d taken the wall separating our rooms out a couple of weeks ago, I was struck by the picture that met me. Reyes lay across both beds, propped up on several pillows, shirtless with only his dark lounge pants, his legs stretched out in front of him, his feet bare, a drink in one hand, and a book in the other. It was like one of those “at home” photos with models that looked like movie stars. 

I almost came at the sight. It was the sexiest thing I’d ever seen. And I’d seen a lot of sexy lately. Would I ever get used to just having him? To just being able to look upon him and know he was mine? Know that I didn’t have to share him unless I got really kinky as I got older and decided to get into threesomes. But I couldn’t imagine ever wanting to share the man before me. I got jealous of his talking to a departed woman today. Granted, she was a gorgeous departed woman. 

“Be still my Betty White,” I said softly.
“What?” he asked without looking up, one corner of his mouth lifting playfully. 

I walked forward and stopped at the edge of the bed. “You. Reading. That is probably the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen a man do.” 

His mouth widened and he finally looked up at me, closing the book in his hand and setting it aside. “Clearly you’ve never seen me pole dance.”

I have to agree with Charley, I'm not sure I can think of a sexiest sight than Reyes Farley, half naked AND reading!! *fans self*

I cannot wait till Emma and I can start our Seventh Grave readalong!

Happy Halloween/Samhain again! 

Let's Celebrate Halloween with Grim Reaper Week AND an INT giveaway!!

Hello guys!!

I'm finally back from vacation and what better way to come back than with a bang and celebrating my favourite holiday: Halloween!!

The lovely Emma of Never Judge a Book by Its Cover decided that we needed to share and celebrate our love of everything Charley Davidson (and let's not forget Reyes Farlow!!) by Darynda Jones and Halloween and decided to do so in the best way possible with Grim Reaper Week!

Emma and myself have a very fun week planned to share our love for the series! We'll share the history of the Grim Reaper, excerpts, fave quotes, some reviews and a very special INTERNATIONAL giveaway for the latest book in the series: Seventh Grave and No Body!

This post should have been up yesterday along with Emma's, but since I was still on vacation and my blogger app in my tablet was acting up... it ended up saved as a draft with wonky bits... But here it is today! The second part of the legend of the Grim Reaper!

The tale begins over at Emma’s blog… here. 

When he stood up, smoky shadows, which spun around in the air like snakes covered his body until they formed a black tattered robe. Then, Life held out his hand and more of these smoky shadows gathered and formed the Death blade, a tall scythe that was black as night, and the blade formed a crescent moon that was half as long as the staff from which it extended. Life gently touched the blade to his hand and then pulled back as a black colored blood dripped down from his hand. He looked to Azrael in his new grim appearance and said in deeply dark but extremely tired voice “Take this scythe and cut down those whose time has run out,” and then he disappeared.

Azrael then began his duty and carried it out extremely well; he became feared and gained a new name as a result, “The Grim Reaper”. As time went on the Reaper grew very tired of following the orders from Life. The Reaper decided he would follow Life through the Omphalos, and take all the power that life controlled for himself. When Life came to Ora to give the Reaper more orders, he was attacked by Azrael. Life became very injured and tried to flee through the Omphalos, but was caught off guard and by surprise on the other side of the Omphalos when the Reaper appeared. The Reaper used his scythe to cut a hole between the universes and bypass the Omphalos, and was able to get to Axiom before Life. He then destroyed Life’s body and absorbed his power.

As the newly born Reaper absorbed this energy and power he laughed out a happy shriek of enjoyment, but then his boney body throbbed, the forces of both Life and Death could not be contained in his weak soul as well as Life’s soul could contain them and his soul shattered into fifty pieces ending him, and giving birth to the Ascendant. The Ascendant was a shade or a ghost who was the remaining power of Life and Death. However the Ascendant could not keep time flowing, he could watch life and deliver it from the creator, but not give death, so he gave one of the fifty shards of the shattered Reaper’s soul to fifty different families, and every Millennia they must fight and collect the shards from one another to become the next reaper.

Darynda was incredibly generous to offer a copy of Seventh Grave and No Body to celebrate Halloween and Grim Reaper Week!

Terms and Conditions. 

It is an INTERNATIONAL GIVEAWAY!

It will run for one week and will end midnight on Halloween. 

Once it finishes I will select the winner and email you. Then I will pass your details directly to the publisher so you can receive this prize. 

Good Luck! 

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